This Shouldn’t Be Here

A while back in the before-reboot-times for this website I spotted something unusual in the wild. I took a picture and here it is:

Vape supplies in the fucking medicine aisle.
Vape supplies in the fucking medicine aisle.

I was in a local supermarket and spotted this selection of vapes for sale in the “health” aisle of the shop. Now, I’m going to say that vapes are intrinsically unhealthy. I know that they are probably healthier than cigarettes or cigars – the more traditional nicotine ingestion methods, but they still contain nicotine. Nicotine is one of the most addictive substances we know. Vaping is probably not safe. It’s just better than the alternative. The healthiest thing would be to not use nicotine at all.

I’ll probably be popping into this supermarket again soon to get some cake. I will have a wander and see if this stuff is still in the healthy aisle. Maybe they are hoping to treat this like the “healthier cheese” I see labelled when I go shopping.

Conflicted

I recently found out that I will be getting a medal for the coronation that took place two days ago as I write this. I already have a jubilee medal and the requirements were very similar – basically have been involved for more than five years. These medals spark some very uncomfortable feelings in me. I am a republican and so wearing these seems to signal my appreciation of the monarchy and all they stand for. I haven’t really done anything to deserve the medal. No one died, no one fought, I haven’t contributed to the country any more than in my little corner of the globe. I don’t feel I deserve a medal when compared to members of the armed forces who have most definitely earnt them.

There are other very strong feelings and thoughts about the history of this country and the medals we give out. For instance, if you are “recognised” you might receive an OBE. This is something along the lines of Order of the British Empire. The British Empire. Still, in 2023. Britain banging on about the Empire. The Empire – the forced colonialisation of most of the world. The death and slavery caused by the Empire is something to be atoned for. The Empire was a racist march over lands used by others to steal and enrich this country. The current wealth of the country owes itself to the racism and wankership of our ancestors. Britain pillaged the world for it’s own gain and now it likes to stand on its crumbling step calling out others for being a little naughty.

The coronation puts on show all of the things that annoy me. A hereditary system of governance, plenty of religion, racists [mainly the current government but also most institutions], stupid symbolism, overt displays of stolen wealth, pomp and ceremony as if that makes a difference. What a load of shit.

So I am conflicted. The cognitive dissonance I employ is strong. Fortunately I only need to wear the medals two or three times a year. I will. But not as an endorsement, as a symbol of the recognition of my time spent messing around in the CCF.

Just Another List

I’ve always enjoyed playing computer/console type games. Ever since the classic Commodore 64 with Chuckie Egg and Manic Miner. So, here’s some of the recent games I am enjoying:

  • Fortnite
  • Minecraft
  • Gran Turismo
  • Minecraft Dungeons
  • X-Plane

I tend to have quite a bit of imposter syndrome so I think if I was asked I would say that I’m not a gamer. But then I have nearly 800 hours on Minecraft so maybe I am.

My Tweets

There used to be a page here that had all my tweets from that micro-blogging site Twitter. In January 2023 I deleted my entire Twitter account. It was not a happy place to hang out and I decided that for my mental health it was time to leave. One thing that stopped me leaving twitter for a while was the fact that many of the communications on this site had embedded tweets and linked to twitter. Once I deleted my account it turned out that the embed code still kinda works and you can see the text of my old tweets, but you can’t access the actual look of them. I can live with that.

A Striking Day

I’ve been taking part in the teacher strikes recently. Interestingly the disruption would happen whether I went in to school or not. As the managers can’t tell who will be in school they can’t ensure the safety and supervision of the pupils, therefore they have to make decisions well in advance of the day about who is going to be in school attending lessons and who is being taught remotely by staff who aren’t striking. I could turn up to work on those strike days and get paid, but I’m known as one of the more “militant” members of staff and I don’t think politically it would be a good idea to threaten strike and then turn up. I put “militant” in quotes as I’m pretty sure that just means standing up for workers’ rights.

During the most recent strike day I took a trip to Dover Castle and then the Battle Of Britain Memorial, both of these are in a corner of Kent. Dover Castle is impressive and full of so much history from Roman lighthouses to Operation Dynamo planning rooms and beyond. The BoB memorial was poignant.

Junkers Stuka Sculpture
Junkers Stuka Sculpture – Battle Of Britain Memorial

Trying To Get Fit [Again]

I’ve had a pretty rubbish time, health and fitness wise, since November so I’m trying my best to get back into running and also getting fitter. I need to lose some mass and the running will get easier if I do that. Currently I can’t run up the Downs and so that is my aim. To lose enough weight to make my fitness enough to run up the Downs and back down again. Today I ran the furthest I’ve done for ages. It felt good but it fucked me up – I ache and feel so tired!

I will keep going. This week has seen a bit of a turn around in motivation.

It’s Been A While

I think I’m back. I’ve missed the diary part of this website and it’s time to utilise it again as a repository of my activities and thoughts.

In some ways the technical challenge of doing this has been fun along with frustrating. It turned out I felt useless not being able to check the things I’ve done or films I’ve seen. There’s a lot of effort gone into creating this site and a lot of words have been written. I want to be able to check my flying records wherever I am. I spent quite a while looking at getting my database exported to a word document but none of that was free. I thought about setting up more hosting accounts but that costs more than I am willing to spend in the current climate and so I recently decided it was time to utilise my NAS drive again.

I had used the NAS in the past for hosting but I never really got around the fact that my home IP address kept changing. It was a pain. Since then I have discovered a company that uses dynamic dns routing and can apply this to a domain name. Hence, this site should now work using the old addressing system. I’m currently working on cloud based back ups in case the NAS dies.

Current costs for this website are now around GBP30 a year compared to the over GBP100 I was paying. Mind you, I don’t have a security certificate so maybe that’s the next level of stuff to look at.

This Is The End

I think I am coming to the conclusion of this website experiment. Current feelings are that I will end this site. I will cancel my hosting service. It is reasonably likely I will also delete my twitter account. I think it’s time.

Why Don’t People Think?

So, this morning I had to drive a short distance which in everyday normal experience is only mildly frustrating. I’ve chilled quite a bit as a driver since I got the Prius and I would say I’m calm. However, today was not normal. There was a lot of snow over night and so the roads were covered in ice and snow. The car took about ten minutes to clear of snow and to make sure it was road worthy. I spent time making sure it was safe for me to drive. I tested the roads at the start of my journey, steering response and braking. This seems sensible to me.

As I drove home I could see other cars not really aware of safety or even other users on the road. Plenty of people were driving what I thought was too fast for the conditions. While they not have had a crash the issue is their ability to react to dangers and then being able to control the vehicle and be safe generally. I let this type of driver past me, who wants that kins of twat to hit you from behind?

Then there was the couple of cars covered in snow with only small viewing areas through the windscreen. These are the sort of people who should be banned from driving. Your whole car should be clear of snow and ice. You shouldn’t shed massive lumps of snow as you are going at speed. You should be able to see out of the whole windscreen and side windows. These people are a danger to others and that’s the thing that bothers me. I generally don’t care if you are a danger to yourself, what bothers me is if you could endanger others. /rant.

Don’t Tell Anyone I’m Enjoying This

You know what? I shouldn’t be ashamed of enjoying this game. I think I’d thought poorly about it in the past but I needed to check my privilege. I shouldn’t be gatekeeping what proper gaming is or looks like. It’s not my place to do that. If you enjoy playing your games then go ahead and enjoy it. I’ve been playing Fortnite and I’m enjoying it. I’m also reasonably ok at it. I know my weak points and I’m going to work on those over the next few weeks to try and get a little better.

Fortnite - Rather Good Fun Really
Fortnite – Rather Good Fun Really

So, a week ago or so Epic were offering the chance to gain extra XP by playing some challenges within a website. I’m not sure what their motivation was but I enjoyed it. I had to get 25 eliminations in a day to get the XP. Somehow I got 44!

Fortnite - One Day's Play
Fortnite – One Day’s Play

The next part of this is to get some colleagues from work and create a super-team for smashing all the competitions. This might take some time but would be so worth it.