Diary Of A Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul

When it’s the hottest day of the year it’s a sensible thing to go to the cinema. It might be just me but two hours in an air-conditioned room being entertained while the UK burns seems like a good idea. I even managed to park in the shadows and made sure that while the sun tracked further south the trees would still bath the car in glorious shadow.

While it might seem that I am moaning about the weather I am not. I love the weather whatever it does. Rain is good, heat is good, bloody cold is good, it’s all part of the life experience and we should relish whatever mother nature throws at us. This might change once I have to put a shirt on tomorrow and spend time at work in this heat. But, I still won’t moan out loud. The idea that Britishness is somehow defined by people moaning about the weather annoys me and I refuse to conform.

As usual I rated this film on IMDB and you should read this communication to get an idea of my scoring system.

Basically this film was the least worse of those at the cinema that I could take young people to. It was enjoyable in a “stupid American comedy” way. I have a whole subset of the comedy genre that is “stupid American”. Things like “Dumb and Dumber” etc. Stupid films where laughs come at the expense of people getting hurt or being stupid.

The film followed the journey of a family heading to MeeMaw’s birthday party. I laughed a couple of times and really enjoyed the performance of the teenage brother, I think he did a great job. The rest of it was full of puerile comedy with no sense of reality in the stunts. But it’s a kids film so that’s ok then.

My Cousin Rachel

Last night I celebrated my first night of freedom from exam marking with a trip to the cinema. I chose to go and see My Cousin Rachel largely because all the other films looked terrible. I don’t want to see the Mummy reboot or the latest Pirates film. I didn’t know a great deal about My Cousin Rachel. I went to the Cienworld Cinema at Rochester, the tide wasn’t in or out.

As is custom on this site I rate films out of 10 on the IMDB website but there are rules and reasons and perhaps you could kindly read this communication.

I’m not that fussed by period dramas. I’m not that fussed by book adaptations. I don’t like films which reinforce the failed concept of a Lord Of The Manor doing good for his people and looking after them, it perpetuates the concept of government FOR the people and that doesn’t seem to exist. I do like Cornwall though.

The short version of this review would be “men and their dicks, eh?”.

The longer version is that I actually enjoys this film. I spend some time worrying about candles and fire, the soot and cleanliness of houses and also wondering what you do once it’s dark outside. Did I say that Cornwall looks bloody lovely, such a beautiful county and filmed wonderfully.

“I say Jeeves, make me a picnic for two, now”. “Fuck you Sir”.

How my response would render me dead or in jail.

Anyway, my current anger at politicians and government is creeping into this review subtly.

So, a young man grows up in a privileged position within society and his uncle goes away and dies after marrying. When the widow turns up young man falls in love with her. But he falls ill. Is she killing him?

I enjoyed this film. It was good looking, sensitive and fun. I thought Rachel Weisz acted the bollocks out of it.

Wonder Woman

I was worried about going to see this film. I had a bad experience at the cinema a few weeks ago and I thought this film could be similar. I went to the Rochester Cineworld cinema and parked under one of the three bridges to protect the car from direct sunlight, it was quite a warm clear day.

So I rated this film on IMDB, which is my custom, and you should see this communication here for explanations of the scoring system.

I really enjoyed this film. I could even argue it was more of a war film than that of Wonder Woman. There were some bits of the first scene that bothered me but overall this film was a very enjoyable experience.

Potential Spoilers Ahead.

We see how Wonder Woman discovers the human race and then battles Aries to end all war. I think that more could have been made of Wonder Woman possibly condemning man to exist in a state of war forever as it is man who clearly loves war. But she discovers LOVE.

Now, I think I’d fuck man over and leave them to their pathetic world of war and hate and killing people because that’s all they deserve. I’m not sure the existence of love is enough to forgive man the shit that he does to other men. The world seems full of hate. Especially when you consider this was set in the First World War.

This was a comic book story and so there needs to be simple discussion about good and bad. This film could have been much more with a deeper discussion of philosophy and how the British and Americans were just as bad as the Germans. I don’t think there was a good side in WW1. It would have been nice to see the humanity of the German soldiers on the front line but they were treated as though they were animals.

This was still a good film even though there wasn’t anything to show the humanity of ALL man. Maybe because it doesn’t exist?

My single WTF issue was when a massively armoured truck turns up at Le Louvre and then the security guard just carries a briefcase in to the museum. The truck seemed overkill or the guard was underkill. Also, the briefcase wasn’t locked. There was no attempt to unlock the combination locks, it just opened.

I liked the slow motion during the fighting scenes. It made the film look more like a comic.

No True Scotsman

I had a leaflet put through the door a few days ago. Normally these are put straight into the round filing cabinet because I already know who I am voting for but this one struck me as something to read.

CPA Front Leaflet
CPA Front Leaflet

This leaflet was like bait being dangled in front of me. So, let’s see what these “christian” people believe are christian values and how they want to treat people.

John Gibson wants to give christians a voice in parliament. Well, that’s interesting. They already have Bishops in the house of lords and the current Prime Minister [hopefully for not much longer] is a “committed” christian, the daughter of a vicar. The number of crusty MPs who will gladly go to church and say they are christian is more than those willing to stand up and say “what a load of bollocks”. There’s this idea that a person who believes in god is more righteous and true than someone who doesn’t. That idea is bollocks.

CPA Back Leaflet
CPA Back Leaflet

The Christian People’s Alliance has “true Christian values”. I’m not entirely sure what true christian values are. Much like there is no true Scotsman there are no true christians. This is similar to the how English do you have to be to be English. It’s a logical fallacy and you can’t define that particular thing at all.

If your rules come from the bible then what about all the shit rules that mean you can rape your slaves and beat your wife. What about ownership of women and people? You can’t cherry pick all the bits that fit your current view of life out of the bible. Oh, yes, you can and do. Let’s quote mine the little bits of the bible we want our church to follow.

If your argument is that we don’t pick the slaves bit of the bible anymore because we recognise it doesn’t work in our society then you have lost EVERY argument for any of your pathetic rules.

Leviticus 25:45

Moreover of the children of the strangers that do sojourn among you, of them shall ye buy, and of their families that are with you, which they begat in your land: and they shall be your possession.

If you then want to say that you only follow the new testament then again you are cherry picking and you are pathetic.

Marriage As God Intended

What they mean here is that marriage should be forever. Let’s keep all those unhappy people stuck with each other for all eternity. They also mean that marriage should be between a man and a woman. They don’t recognise same sex relationships. They don’t want people who love each other to be able to get married and promise their love to each other. They want to exclude forms of relationship that don’t meet their stupid beliefs [much like the current Prime Minister]. There are detailed policies to force unhappy couples to stay together. What if the husband beats the wife? What if the husband is a thief?

Why can’t people who love each other get married and those who decide they are happier apart leave each other?

All Life Matters

Of course it does. But that doesn’t mean we can make our own choices about our bodies. We are autonomous creatures. Women can choose when they want to have children and people should be allowed to die if that is what they want.

So they believe life begins at conception [why not fertilisation?] and then ends when you NATURALLY die. Does this mean we should accept all disease? Are doctors doing the bidding of god? Who decides when natural death is happening? Should we have defibrillators in public places? What about all the clusters of eggs flushed down the loo when something goes wrong after conception?

Care For The Poor

They don’t want anyone sleeping rough. That’s a good thing. But they won’t give a bed to those on drugs or drink. What the fuck. This is a classic. If you aren’t willing to help people who have alcohol or drug problems then how christian are you? There are probably very good reasons these people rely on drugs or alcohol. But no, fuck ’em. It’s their own fault and we won’t help people who can’t help themselves. How christian is that?

Support Persecuted Christians

It’s not just christians persecuted in Pakistan. Atheists are being murdered out there, and in Saudi Arabia, and in loads of other countries. Perhaps this party should promise to remove persecution entirely. But, no. That doesn’t support their narrative that christians are persecuted and should be protected. It doesn’t help their cause. Be nice to people as long as they are like us.

I tried to see the CPA website but it wouldn’t load.

CPA Website
CPA Website

John Gibson’s website loaded fine and it has a rainbow-like pattern on the homepage.

Will I vote for these preachers? No.

Do I think they are hate preaching wankers? Yes.

Do I think they have true christian values? No.

Duxford Airshow

May 28 2017 was a good day. I travelled to Duxford Airfield in Cambridgeshire for one of their airshows. Now, I’ve been to Duxford a lot and have taken some lovely photographs. I discuss my favourite birds here and more photographs are here. You can just search in that little box just over to the right.

The Imperial War Museum at Duxford is so large that it takes more than a day to see everything and that’s without a flying display to watch. I only zoomed around the hangers and static aircraft, paused at the Bloodhound replica, and then watched the gorgeous displays.

Of the static aircraft on display some were open for a walk through, I visited all of these:

  • Concorde
  • Hermes
  • York
  • Comet
  • Ambassador
  • Viscount
  • Britannia
  • VC10
  • Trident
  • One-Eleven
  • Herald

Of the flying aircraft, I was most impressed with the Typhoon, Rafale, Bronco and the Autogyro. All of these exhibited remarkable agility, they were stunning to watch. It was very good to see a Typhoon display for my first time along with the Rafale too. The Bronco is iconic and looked lovely. Even the World War 1 display wasn’t boring!

If you don’t find the Catalina gorgeous then you aren’t into planes.

The weather was really hot for the day and the storms went either side of Duxford so we didn’t get wet. I had paid for a ticket upgrade so there was a marquee with tables and chairs where we sat. Along with posh portaloos and a seating area outside just by the tower this proved to be a worthwhile investment. Well worth doing as I could dump stuff and walk around with just the camera.

The photos above are a selection from the over 400 that were taken on the day. My challenge next time is to get the colours showing on the aircraft more when they are flying. Photographs of just silhouettes aren’t that interesting.

Lego 55 Model 60163

Last one this week in the mini-Lego season. A surfing scenario! Just in time for the release of Baywatch, which I shall not be reviewing.

60163
60163

Lego 53 Model 75132

Here we go with a Star Wars Lego kit. Just a mini one really and not worth building. It seems that the Lego people have been designing “scenes” rather than models that can create story. As an example here’s the Death Of Darth Maul Lego scene.

75132
75132

Lego 52 Model 76062

In the continuing mini-series of Lego season here we have a couple of superheroes:

76062
76062

This is Robin and Kane (?).

I’ve been corrected. It is Bane. I would embed the tweet but it’s protected so can’t.

Miss Sloane

I went to see Miss Sloane. Je voyageais par la route de l’autre côté de la rivière, c’était une marée haute. The river looked lovely and calm. I rated this film using IMDB and this one got a 6. You might find it helpful to read my communication about the scoring system.

This, was I guess, a political thriller. It was pretty good. I found the performance of the lead actor probably kept it going well. There was a little too much intrigued and double guessing for me. I haven’t worked in high management or politics but I do think that the political system largely reacts to random events and, while there may be a grand plan, it never really gets too far gone.

I quite enjoyed this film and the cinema provided some respite from the warm temperatures in this lands at the moment. This is not a complaint. I like the heat. I just dislike sun burn. Which I spent a good proportion of my youth suffering with.

I guess the amount of writing here tells you how much I was affected by this film. It didn’t really impact on me. Just have a look at films I thought were stunning or absolutely terrible. I write way more when I’m really happy or annoyed at a film.