Author: Ian

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Morbius

So, yesterday I took the short trip to Cineworld at Rochester to see the Sony Marvel film Morbius. I had booked to see something about a lost city but have decided to see that film over the weekend. I might try and find somewhere with a 4DX cinema to watch a film as it’s been a while since I’ve seen one of those. Luckily for me Ashford Cineworld has been upgraded to a 4DX. Unluckily for me Ashford is at the other end of Operation Brock – the massive queue of lorries on the M20 trying to cross the channel. I start these communications by saying what state the tide was in as I approached the cinema and I can tell you it was low. All the mud bank was showing, the barge was in its own little pool and the water was very low. See this picture.

Medway At Rochester Low Tide
Medway At Rochester Low Tide

After I watch a film at the cinema I then rate it on IMDB and there’s a whole system about how that works. See this communication about how I decide what score to give a film. Then, when I am active on Twitter, because I have times when I remove the app from my phone – it’s not a healthy place to be -, I tweet the result to my millions of followers so they can see what I thought.

So, what did I think of this film? It was boring and unimpressive. I wonder if we’ve reached peak superhero? I know that I generally don’t like superhero films and this one was one of the worst I have seen. It was all pretty standard and just “meh”. There are a couple of things I made a mental note while watching to try and remember to write about and so here we go: Morbius’ pin is the “last six digits of pi” reversed and I wasn’t sure whether to burst out laughing or not at this. Was this deliberate or a pure accident? Pi, when expanded in decimal number system, is an irrational number and so there isn’t a last digit of pi. Was this a clever joke or a stupid mistake? I’m not sure. Morbius requires human blood but there’s no explanation why it has to be human. The bats don’t drink the blood of other bats. Why would he need to drink human blood? This didn’t make sense. Also, at the end of the film his girlfriend – who appears at first just to be a co-worker but then they kiss on the roof tops and that was definitely NOT mentioned before that point – turns into a vampire thing because Morbius bit her. What? How did that happen? Why did that happen? This movie is a load of crap. Oh, and at the end in the final big fight the two chaps seemed to fall a good few thousand feet off a building which wasn’t really that high. I’ve no idea how this happened. Oh, Morbius gets a lab from come counterfeiters but then doesn’t really use that place for anything except building a centrifuge which he could have ordered from Amazon a lot easier.

I did watch Joker recently on Netflix after Smith recommended it. I was told there isn’t really any superhero stuff in it. This was a good film. Joker is more a social commentary than DC film and there are plenty of lessons within. Don’t waste your time with Morbius. Watch Joker instead.

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Vol. 3: The Subliminal Verses – Slipknot

I’ve had this album playing while I’ve been sorting out my SSL certificate on this website. So, given the music has finished I’ve been working on this for about an hour. I’d like to say I managed to do it all myself but I had to employ some lovely people at my hosting company a few times to guide me through the process. I think it’s something I did about two years ago so it’s unlikely for me to remember all the things I have to do. I also find that terminology changes between help pages and the actual webpages that you are trying to edit so it can be a pain sometimes when you aren’t sure if you are doing the right thing.

This album has some awesome songs on it, mostly I think I know them from the Antennas From Hell live album but they are still good songs. I highly recommend The Blister Exists, Duality, Before I forget.

It’s a Slipknot album. It’s what you expect. Chaos and noise. It’s great.

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How Long To Platinum?

I was a little upset the other night as I had finished a particular championship on Gran Turismo 7 and I got the ending movie! I wasn’t expecting it so soon. I’m hoping they add more championships over time but there’s still plenty of game content for me to work through. Apparently I have 294 trophies to get through to unlock the platinum trophy. Now, I have never unlocked a platinum so maybe I won’t make it but it is something to aim for. I had the following in a nice email from the Sony people:

GT Finale Email
GT Finale Email
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Everything’s Connected

I have been quite impressed with the capabilities of the PlayStation 5. The graphics look amazing, the load times are impressively short and the sound is great. They recently added the ability to link screen captures into the app on a mobile phone making it much easier to save images and videos from games. I can now save a short video, get it on my phone and then send it anywhere I want. This is brilliant. PlayStations have had the ability to directly share with YouTube and Twitter for a while, they might even do Faceshit but I don’t really do that one. Having said that it’s impressive that I can now get this stuff on my phone I’m going to show you some captures I made recently and then uploaded to YouTube.

This first video I captured from Gran Turismo 7 was me driving a Ferrari thing and absolutely smashing it. I really enjoyed this short test. This most definitely wasn’t the first go at this licence. You see, the first go is generally learning about the car; how good are the brakes, how well does the thing turn in, what’s the oversteer like, what’s the engine sound on gear shift? Once you’ve got a grasp of all of that you can then start with a solid run to get the licence and then build up to the limit to get the Gold. Well, that’s how I do it.

This video is another Ferrari but this time a complete circuit around Monza. I really enjoyed this but it definitely wasn’t the first attempt. See the previous paragraph.

The final video I put on YouTube, for now, is me completing one of the Super Licence tests which is a complete lap around Interlagos in a Pagani. This took quite a few attempts and was good fun, although I don’t really like the accidental change into first at the last slow corner.

Getting Gold on every licence test is a bit of an obsession. I mean, why wouldn’t you? One of the Super Licence tests is an F1 clone type car around Laguna Seca. I think it took about an hour of my time to get gold. Sometimes I went off at the third corner, sometimes the last corner. It’s quite frustrating to get close to the end of the circuit knowing you are a couple of tenths ahead of the ghost car [your previous best lap] and then bin the car in the gravel.

Having said all the stuff above I am enjoying the game. I like the challenge and I’m happy plodding along doing a little each day. I know there’s been quite a backlash to the rewards and “lucky dip” that the game designers have made but I also wonder if people just aren’t patient enough to want to play a game long term. I very rarely finish a game but one thing I know for sure is that I’d rather enjoy it that complete it, if that makes sense. I don’t see games as movies which I suspect is how many other players see them. If the game can allow me to do something I can do in real life and make it fun then I’m happy.

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Only Two Hours Sleep You Say?

It has been an interesting few weeks. I recently met up with my good friend Jamie from Cornwall and had a nice meal with him and Smith. When I returned to my car and started it all hell broke loose and it sounded as though the exhaust had fallen off! I turned it on again just to see what would happen and – BLAM – still the same [sexy for a race car] noise. There is no way a Toyota Prius should sound like that. So I had to call the AA for Bora Horza Gobuchul. Now, being a male and having broken the car in the leafy Surrey suburbs I was not top of the list to be helped, but that is perfectly fine. It makes sense that women and vulnerable people should be helped first. We shouldn’t live in a world where that discrimination is necessary but as there is a very clear problem with male-on-female violence I’m happy to wait.

The AA man turned up and I described what the car sounded like. He grabbed a torch and looked underneath the vehicle. “Your catalytic converter’s been nicked”. In the couple of hours I was with my friends people had come and jacked up my car and sawn out the catalytic converter. This was a bit of a “bugger” moment as I was hoping he could just do some bolts up and I’d be on my way back home. Nope. The AA man called for a flat-bed truck to come and get me. Again, I’m down the list of priority so I had to wait until 0230 for the truck to arrive. I was slightly terrified of having to start the engine to get the car onto the truck as the Prius can only be put into neutral with the power system turned on, if the battery is low the engine will start. It turned out there was enough juice in the hybrid battery to run the car on EV power for a short while. It was loaded onto the truck and we headed off to Kent.

I had Bora Horza Gobuchul dropped off at an exhaust centre a couple of miles from my house and I got home a little before 0400. I went to bed and got up after not sleeping particularly well to organise work things and getting to the exhaust centre to explain the car dumped outside their workshop. I had already planned to cycle to work for a few days this particular week and so I had all my shower kit and spare clothes at school. So, I just had to cycle a few more days. Fortunately the weather was good and quite warm. Hopefully it’ll be similar the next time I cycle to work. The ride is about thirty minutes and as the majority of it follows the Medway towpath is actually really pleasant.

After speaking to insurance people and various garages it turned out that if I needed a courtesy car then I would have to get Bora Horza Gobuchul fixed at their choice of garage. In Ashford. The guys at ATS couldn’t fix the Prius because they can only replace the exhaust with OEM parts and they don’t have a deal with Toyota. So I had to get the car fixed in Ashford. After calling them I had to wait five days before they could get to me! Five days. I phoned them on the Friday, they couldn’t get the car picked up until I had uploaded a photograph of the car showing it can’t be driven. This was an amusing piece of administration as I couldn’t take a photo of the bits of the car showing I couldn’t drive it because from the outside it just looked like a normal car. While they understood this they also said that they can’t proceed until I upload a photo. I was at work. My car was thirty minutes bike ride away. So, I had an old photo of the car, cropped the background out, removed the meta-data and uploaded that. The garage said they would be able to get to me for Tuesday morning between 0800 and 1300.

I managed to borrow a friend’s car for the weekend and to run small jobs and the sorts of journeys you take for granted when you have a car. Even so I was mighty pissed off that I was expecting a speedy service and all that happened with me was delay and delay. So, I am currently in the position of waiting for Bora Horza Gobuchul to be fixed. I have a courtesy car which is ok. It’s a car. I don’t like it, but it’s a car. It’s nice to be mobile. All the money side of the admin has yet to be completed and I’m hoping to get the Prius early next week. I have no idea whether I’ll get a cat-lock fitted next time it’s in for a service. I suspect that if people want to steal my catalytic converter then they will.

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Deepest Darkest Essex

While driving with my parents to a restaurant/café for lunch I noticed this strange thing by the road. It seemed pertinent to stop and tell my children of the punishment methods of the past. People I give you the Great Canfield Stocks and Whipping Post.

Green Street Stocks and Whipping Post
Green Street Stocks and Whipping Post

The sign explains that the stocks were replaced to commemorate the start of the third millennium. I’m quite curious to know what was in this position before these and the history of them. The sign explains the stocks were last used in 1860 for a case of drunkenness and also that this site was where Elizabeth Abbott was burnt as a witch in 1693. The sheer terror I feel with how we used to treat people is only masked by the general terror I feel for how we treat people these days. I’m not sure we’ve moved on that far.

This is comms#2023 and I’m still trying to work out what to replace my “events each year” thing. Give me some time and when I get a chance I will figure this out. Things have been a little busy recently with work and also my car being off the road because some cunts stole the catalytic converter. I’m currently waiting for it to be towed to be repaired along with getting a courtesy car.

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Uncharted

So I went to see Uncharted at the third attempt! The first time I was due to go I had a migraine and so cancelled the tickets. The second time I thought I had double booked myself and so also cancelled those tickets and finally I went to see it yesterday. I suspect it seems like I was desperate to see this film but really it was the only thing on at the cinema that I even kind of wanted to see. The tide was quite high and coupled with the lovely sunshine the whole scene was particularly lovely, I was slightly annoyed I hadn’t left with more time to walk along the riverside and take some pictures but I was completing licence tests in Gran Turismo 7 and at the moment some things take priority.

After watching the film I rated it on IMDB and there’s a whole other communication somewhere on this site telling you how the rating system works. I then tweet the result at some point depending on whether I have the Twitter app on my phone or not. I am currently in a period of not-having the app on my phone so the tweeting has to wait for me to get to my PC and remember to do it.

Now what follows is traditionally where I write about the film and why I gave it the score I did. So I guess I should do that. I didn’t hate this film. I don’t know the game at all so I wasn’t that bothered by it following the storyline of that. There was a point where I was bored of the film and honestly just wanted it to end. I think I decided I didn’t hate the film by the end of it. There’s only so much treasure hunting you can do, especially when it isn’t interesting.

It’s amusing that scammers would be able to figure out where a load of buried treasure would be when academics who have studied these things for years have no idea. At least Indiana Jones was a university dude. I honestly have so many questions about how the movie makers think the world works, but I suspect they would just wave me off with “plot” or something. For instance, GPS underground? Two whole ships in a cave with a tiny entrance? Helicopters carrying said ships? No noise in a C17 with the cargo doors open?

On a larger matter I found it funny that the heroes were both white dudes. The bad people was one Spanish old guy, a Scotsman, and two women, the only women who just happened to be not-white. I’m not entirely sure what this says about the world and what we subconsciously think about it. Except, we most definitely know the world is a racist place.

So, this is communication 2022 and the list of things that happened in that year I guess must come to an end. It is March and we aren’t that far through the year but it’s already really fucking shit. There are some good things, I went to LA with my friends, but mostly it’s all shit. I want to replace the “things that happened in that year” but I’m not sure what with at the moment. I will ponder and let you know.

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Still Flying Around The World

I am still flying around the world in a series of flights on the flight simulator. I’ll have to look back through here to figure out when I started but I’m currently on the Kamchatka peninsula heading towards the Bering Straights. My most recent flight looks like this:

Kamchatka Flight
Kamchatka Flight

I’ve generally been doing flights of a few hundred miles but every now and then I put in one of a few thousand. I’m not sure if I’m going to Hawaii or not at the moment. I wonder if I head there, then California and on to South America. I honestly am not sure. I do know that once I get to Iceland I am pretty much done and then what do I do? It’s been fun planning the flights and heading around the world in this simulated world.

The last communication that covered a list of airports ended at Tenzing Hillary Airport in Nepal and so here is the rest of the list to bring us up to date:

Tumling Tar Airport, Nepal
Lhasa Gonggar Airport, Tibet
Paro Airport, Bhutan
Yonphula Airport, Bhutan
Kyaukhtu South Airport, Myanmar
Yangon International, Myanmar
Kyaukhtu South Airport, Myanmar
Dawei Airport, Myanmar
Myeik Airport, Myanmar
Kawthaung Airport, Myanmar
Singapore Changi Airport, Singapore
Brunei International Airport, Brunei
Syamsudin Noor International Airport, Indonesia
Selaparang Airport, Indonesia
Sumbawa Besar Airport, Indonesia
Sultan Muhammad Salahuddin Airport, Indonesia
Komodo International Airport, Indonesia
El Tari International Airport, Indonesia
Darwin International Airport, Australia
Broome International Airport, Australia
Port Hedland International Airport, Australia
Karratha Airport, Australia
Kalbarri Airport, Australia
RAAF Gingin, Australia
Bunbury Airport, Australia
Albany Regional Airport, Australia
Ravensthorpe Airport, Australia
Esperance Airport, Australia
Norseman Airport, Australia
Port Lincoln Airport, Australia
Adelaide Airport, Australia
Kingston Airport, Australia
Portland Airport, Australia
Warrnambool Airport, Australia
Apollo Bay Airport, Australia
Moorabbin (Harry Hawker) Airport, Australia
Burnie Airport, Australia
Hobart Airport, Australia in the Avro Vulcan
Te Anau Airport, New Zealand
Invercargill Airport, New Zealand
Ryan’s Creek Aerodrome, New Zealand
Queenstown Airport, New Zealand
Christchurch Airport, New Zealand
Woodbourne Airport, New Zealand
Wellington Airport, New Zealand
New Plymouth Airport, New Zealand
Auckland Airport, New Zealand
Nouméa Magenta Airport, New Calendonia
Honiara International Airport, Solomon Islands
Rabaul Airport, Papua New Guinea
Lae Nadzab Airport, Papua New Guinea
Goroka Airport, Papua New Guinea
Kagamuga International Airport, Papua New Guinea
Dortheys Hiyo Eluay International Airport, Indonesia
Rendani Airport, Indonesia
Domine Eduard Osok Airport, Indonesia
Buli/Halmahera Island Airport, Indonesia
Sam Ratulangi International Airport, Indonesia
Naha Airport, Indonesia
General Santos International Airport, Philippines
Francisco Bangoy International Airport, Philippines
Lumbia Airfield, Philippines
Surigao Airport, Philippines
Panan-awan Airport, Philippines
Daniel Z. Romualdez Airport, Philippines
Catarman National Airport, Philippines
Legazpi Airport, Philippines
Bagasbas Airport, Philippines
Fort Magsaysay Airport, Philippines
Xiamen Gaoqi International Airport, China
Wenzhou Longwan International Airport, China
Zhoushan Putuoshan Airport, China
Jeju International Airport, South Korea
Pyongyang International Airport, DPRK
Orang Airport, DPRK
Yanji Chaoyangchuan International Airport, China
Vladivostok International Airport, Russia
Sapporo Okadama Airport, Japan
Monbetsu Airport, Japan
Iturup Island Airport, Russia
Elizovo Airport, Russia
Klyuchi Air Base Airport, Russia

And there we have it. The list so far since the last communication. Not sure how to conquer the Pacific, will keep thinking about it.

Kamchatka Peninsula Flight
Kamchatka Peninsula Flight

This is communication number 2021 and so here are some things that happened in that year of our lord:

  • NASA’s Ingenuity helicopter performs the first powered flight on another planet in history.
  • Ryanair Flight 4978 is forced to land by Belarusian authorities to detain dissident journalist Roman Protasevich.
  • The number of recorded deaths from COVID-19 surpasses 5 million.
  • Barbados becomes a republic on its 55th anniversary of independence while remaining a member of the Commonwealth of Nations.
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So Close But Absolutely No Gold

So, in this new Gran Turismo version we get to try and complete all the licences again to be able to race in all the different series. I think I’m on the third licence and it’s not really one of those parts of the game I really enjoy. Mind you, I find it incredibly frustrating so when I do pass the actual licence I am cheered by it. Some of the licences I have got gold first time, others have taken me about half an hour on continuing to try.

Just So Frustrating
Just So Frustrating

The above licence I missed out on gold by four one thousandths of a second. That was really annoying.

I like that GT Auto is back and you can wash your car. I also like the fact we can change the oil and other parts. There are options for a whole new body and also a new engine so wouldn’t that mean it was a brand new or different car? Looking at my profile I can see that my average fuel consumption is 2.47 km/l this is 6.9 miles per gallon for the UK and USA audience. I’m going to have to see if I can get that more uneconomical.

I’ve been writing a few things that happened in the year of the communication number and this is number 2020 so here are some things that happened then:

  • Covid 19 causes a heap of shit around the world and it is amplified by poor leadership in many countries.
  • Brent Crude falls to $27 a barrel. It is currently $109. But there’s a war going on and shortness of supplies.
  • King Salman issues a royal decree, declaring that people will no longer be executed in Saudi Arabia for crimes they were convicted of when they were minors. Well, this means they were doing it before this date. It’s bloody 2020!
  • The Royal Astronomical Society announces the detection of phosphine in Venus’ atmosphere, which is known to be a strong predictor for the presence of microbial life.
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Probably The First Of Many

Just a short communication today to point out my first screen share video uploaded to my YouTube channel. I’ve uploaded a few short clips to my Twitter feed but this is the first I’ve really thought about. I saved the replay of this in GT7 and then video captured it. I guess I should have a go at streaming from the PS5 but that can happen later. The video shows me attempting, and passing, one of the challenges. I had to overtake all three jeeps in front of me [well, the couldn’t be behind me]. I passed, but only just. I was really impressed with the dirt graphics and the headlights. Man, the headlights.

This is communication number 2019 and in keeping with a recent tradition and genuinely not having a clue about what to do in three communication’s time here are some things that happened in that year:

  • A mine dam breaks in Brumadinho, Minas Gerais, Brazil. At least 248 people are killed, with 22 missing.
  • Scientists from the Event Horizon Telescope project announce the first ever image of a black hole, located in the centre of the M87 galaxy.
  • The redefinition of the SI system of measurement adopted by the majority of countries in the world takes effect.
  • First known human case of Coronavirus disease 2019, in Wuhan, Hubei, China.
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