Tesco are rubbish

I had to take a toy back to Tesco as I had found it 20% cheaper at Argos and Tesco say you can just change your mind and return an item. So I checked the T&Cs at the back of the catalogue and took the required items back to Tesco Grove Green.

  • The product with original packaging
  • The order confirmation email

from the catalogue

My wife had ordered the toy and paid using her card but she was out that day but the catalogue and email said the card wasn’t necessary.

I go to Tesco and hand back the toy and show the email.

Do you have the card used to pay for the toy?

No, was my reply. The instructions in the catalogue say you don’t have to bring it back with you.

It will say somewhere in the email that you need to bring the card. You always need the payment card when you return items.

After looking through the email, I suggest that the person serving me have a look as it says exactly the same as the catalogue: just bring the product and the email confirmation. Could I possibly have the returned money as a giftcard?

yes, but only this once and as a goodwill gesture.

My problem with this is that if the return instructions had said I needed the payment card then I would have taken it. Why was I made to feel like an idiot when I was following instructions from Tesco.
The person serving me refused after that point to look at me. I was trying to point out that perhaps she could talk to someone senior about the fact that the emails and catalogue are wrong. I tried to say this in as helpful manner as possible but obviously failed.

Tesco: you have messed up.

The origin of wine

A foible of mine:

I only buy and drink wine from regions I have visited

Fortunately I have been to Bordeaux and other great wine producing areas but I just decided about a year ago that I might as well impose a restriction just for the hell of it. Should someone offer me wine then I will drink it from anywhere. For me, this rule just makes choosing wine a little more interesting.
Places I can’t drink:

  • South America
  • North America (apart from Florida)
  • Asia (apart from Hong Kong and Singapore)
  • Africa

Individual areas that I can drink:

  • Most of France
  • Bits of Spain
  • Cyprus
  • South East Australia
  • Southern Portugal
That’s about it. Hey, as the Great Sheldon said “if your going to have foibles you might as well make them bizarre”.

Extras

I’ve given up treats such as chocolate, crisps and donuts bought in by other department members.
Essentially I’m not bothered by crisps but I do like chocolate. I have decided to give up all “treats” for around six months or so. I won’t eat them at home or buy them.  If they are offered as food at a friend’s house then that is fine.
Really this is about losing (or not gaining) weight and proving I have some willpower. Now I just need to promise that I’ll play the PS3 a bit more.

LED Car Lights

When Audi put super bright LED lights on the front of their cars I was really impressed. They looked cool and were possibly a good safety feature.
Then everyone got in on the act. Citroën, Porsche, VW and the other day I swear I saw a KIA with these lights.
Now I’ve changed my mind. They aren’t cool. They are annoying. Always on and too bright if these lights were the reason you bought a car then get your head examined. They are the automobile equivalent of a snake shaped belt buckle.
I’m not convinced of any safety argument either. If manufacturers want lights on all the time because they know that most drivers can tell when to flick the switch then change your name to Volvo.

Bands I have seen

This is a memory test. Trying to list the bands I have seen live. I guess this page will be edited as I remember the hazy days of long ago before children.

1st Concert
Iron Maiden (support: White Dwarf) 10 December 1988, Wembley Arena

After that:
AC/DC, Wembley Arena, Donington, Wembley Stadium
Aesthetic Perfection, The Underworld
Alice in Chains, Cambridge Corn Exchange twice, Download ’13
Asking Alexandria, Wembley Arena
Bon Jovi, Wembley Arena, Wembley Stadium, Twickenham
Bullet For My Valentine, Wembley Arena
Combichrist, Wembley Arena
Dan Reed Network, Wembley Arena
Diamond Head, Milton Keynes Bowl
Elvis Presley (kind of), Wembley Arena
Evile, Brixton Academy
Faith No More, Wembley Stadium
Gary Moore, Wembley Arena
Great White, Wembley Arena
Guns ‘n’ Roses, Wembley Stadium twice and Milton Keynes Bowl
Iron Maiden, Cambridge Corn Exchange twice and Earls Court
Jose Gonzalez, Shepherds Bush Empire
Killing Joke, O2 Academy Islington
King’s X, Wembley Arena
KMFDM, O2 Academy Islington
Level 42 (the shame), Wembley Arena
Lostprophets, Brixton Academy
Madonna, Wembley Stadium
Megadeth, Wembley Arena, Cambridge Corn Exchange, Milton Keynes Bowl, Brixton Academy
Metallica, Wembley Arena, Earls Court, Donington, Milton Keynes Bowl
Ministry, Brixton Academy
Motley Crüe, Wembley Arena, Donington
Nine Inch Nails, Wembley Stadium, Brixton Academy
Prince, Earls Court
Peter Green – Chatham Theatre
Queensryche, Donington
Rammstein, Wembley Arena
Senser, Portsmouth somewhere, Underworld
Skid Row, Wembley Arena, Wembley Stadium
Slayer, Wembley Arena Earls Court
Suicidal Tendencies, Wembley Area
Testament, Wembley Arena, KoKo
The Almighty, Cambridge Corn Exchange, Milton Keynes Bowl
The Black Crowes, Donington, Brixton Academy
The Darkness, Wembley Arena
Treponem Pal, O2 Academy Islington
Ugly Kid Joe, Wembley Stadium
UK Subs, The Square
Van Halen, Wembley Stadium
Wat Tyler, The Square
White Lion, Wembley Arena
Winger, The Astoria
Wolfsbane, Cambridge Corn Exchange twice, The Marquee
Yngwie Malmsteen, Shepherds Bush Empire

For the Download 2013 list click here.

PS3 Insurance no more

The other day I got a letter from Domestic and General who are the people who underwrite my PS3 insurance. My payments are to increase from £4.99 to £7.99! That’s a 75% increase! Now even given the ironic situation of times past I have phoned D&G and cancelled my policy. Somehow £60 a year seemed ok but nearly £96 is ridiculous. I’ve also cancelled my Sky+HD insurance as I’ve just had a new box.
Now, if the PS3 dies I’ll buy another. They are cheap enough. Then I’ll do my best to fix my classic 60 Gb model. It’s lovely! Lots of USB ports, PS2 backwards compatibility (suck on that you later model users), multimedia card slots and SACD playback because, yes, I bought some of those!
Now I just need to remember to back up my game saves regularly.

Patriotism

I always feel a twinge of patriotism whenever I see the Union Flag or Cross of St George on the back bumper of a car. Seeing the red, white and blue or just red and white makes a touch of “proud” run through my blood.
The person who spent around £5 on a bumper sticker or magnet obviously has a price limit attached to their patriotism because the vehicle is more often than not built in a different country. BMWs with the England flag, Mercedes with the Union flag and Chevrolets with a Cornwall flag.
I believe that if you are that patriotic then your car should reflect your taste in flag adornments!
Actually, I’m not that patriotic. I have some teams I follow and watch mainly the Essex cricket team, the England cricket team and the New Orleans Saints. I wouldn’t say I’m a fan. I tend to watch on tv and have a little emotional investment but it’s not the end of the world if they lose.
Following a team or patriotism or religion just satisfies our human need to belong to a tribe. None of them can be suggested to be a better form of tribalism than the other. Country, Jesus, town, county, country, football team It’s all the same thing really.

I am writing

Two minor things that annoy me are symptoms of my inflexible understanding of language. I will talk about negative questioning, which troubles me, another time but for now here are two main methods of starting a letter:

Dear Sir,
I am writing to inform you that the programme you showed . . .

Dear Sir,
I wish to inform you that the programme you showed . . .

Both of these annoy me. In the first case it is obvious you are writing so there’s no need to state that. Just start by saying

“I found the programme you showed the other night rather sexless”.

The second method of starting a letter would have me reply

“you can wish all you like but you won’t get it”.

I do understand that language is fluid and evolves but we could always force a correction in usage if we insist on decent use of the English language.

I must be on the spectrum somewhere but I don’t interpret language literally it just annoys me when people are inaccurate.

Whose next top model?

My wife and I have finally given up on %%%%% Next Top Model, where %%%%% is a variable string representing one of the following:
America’s, Britain’s, Canada’s, Australia’s

I estimate I have seen fourteen series of America’s Next Top Model, three seasons of Australia’s Next Top Model, two of Canada’s and four of Britain’s Next Top Model. Now I will watch no more. Finally I have become bored with the format. It was fun watching young women argue and shout at each other while living in the same apartment. It was fun learning about the industry of fashion, which is still one that I think is mostly a crock of shit. I don’t see that fashion does anything useful. It was fun watching girls cry when their hair is cut short on the advice of the experts, but finally I am bored and moving on to other things.

It always struck me as interesting that the girls who shout the loudest are usually the ones who fail. See also X Factor and other such shows. Those who have humility are usually the ones who succeed.

No MORE. Thanks Tyra Banks for the show but it is time to move on.

An aside: whenever I have spoken to pupils at work, it is a boys’ school, they like to claim I am “gay” for watching a modelling programme. This is interesting, as I explain, because what I am watching is half naked women and commenting on how they look and NOT getting hit by my wife. They don’t get it.

Fiction

Picture of part of my bookshelf. Note the fiction title surrounded by reference books!

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