House Fairy

I stayed at a friend’s house last night. He’s a good friend so I shan’t name him. If you know me well, you’ll know who I’m talking about.
I get to sleep on the divan in the office. I don’t have a problem with that per se. My problem is with the state of wiring in his office. This picture shows the state of wires and plugs in one corner under the desk!

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This particular set up is somewhat distressing. Not really because of the fire risk but more because it needs a good tidy up. The total current drain is quite small and so the fire risk is pretty minimal. But, look at the state of it! Quite distressing!
I might start a service called “House Fairies”. Give me your address and at sometime while you are out I’ll come and magically wire up your appliances nice and neatly with proper colours and clips, making it look lovely and you’ll know where things are. Another part of this service would be to adjust any light switches which work the wrong way around. The house where this photo was taken also has light switch where you have to press the top bit to turn the light on. This is wrong. I can adjust that.

The light switch when the light is off (flash photo):

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The light switch when the light is on:

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I should have a website where you sign up and list the “House Fairy” jobs you want done. I will then come around at some random time and, Hey Presto! You’ll come home one day and everything in your house will work properly!

Racing Approach

I probably do it all wrong. I’ve no idea what other people do. It’s not what should be done in real life.

I recently started a line of communications looking at my progress through GT6. There’s a definite pattern to my play. I have made the following conclusions:

  • Try to get a steady lap time recorded to ensure I have an idea of:
    • Control under braking
    • Control under power
    • How much under/oversteer
    • Corner speed
    • Gearing
  • Try to increase speed at the first few corners, normally coming off a lot.
  • Try to increase start speed.
  • Try to maximise corner speed on all corners, normally with one or two bogie corners.
  • Crash a lot.

This approach isn’t what should happen in the real world. No-one could afford to pay me to drive and crash as much as I do. If I was driving in real life I would need to have an innate understanding of where the limit of traction and how to improve speed around a track. I would also, I hope, have better reactions to control the car. To get such a deep understanding I would need to have been driving and undertaking purposeful practice for a long time. It’s no surprise that the world’s best racers in any of the top formats started racing and driving when they were young and so effectively know no different.

To learn to race a car as fast as possible would require a certain number of crashes and offs, but not as many as afforded me in the console game. There’s no danger to life in the game, I just press restart.

There are some of you who might be thinking that I need to change my approach and that you want to tell me I don’t do it the right way. To you I say, “maybe” and “I know”. It’s something to work on in the future.

GT6 Birthday Present

If you sign into GT6 on or after your birthday you get a present. The car you receive is from the year you were born. I will remain grateful for the present but surely there were other cars released in 1972!

GT6 Birthday Present 2014
GT6 Birthday Present 2014

Super Licence S-5

The last of the Super Licence tests and it’s to Ronda in Spain and the Ascari race circuit in a Bugatti Veyron. A big heavy car with loads of power.

Times required:

  • Gold 2:14
  • Silver 2:16
  • Bronze 2:20

Here’s the car at the start line [I’ve been playing with the photographic settings within GT6].

Veyron at Ascari
Veyron at Ascari

A map of the track:

Ascari Track Map
Ascari Track Map

The start line is inbetween KZ1 and Rafael.

Progress was as follows:

Lap 1 – 2:30:848
Lap 2 – off 1/4 of the way around (Copse).
Lap 3 – Off at Rafael.
Lap 4 – Off 2/3 way (Sebring).
Lap 5 – Off KZ1, too fast on exit.
Lap 6 – 2:18:833 Bronze.
Lap 7 – 2:16:873.

Corner 1 and 2, Veyron, Ascari
Rafael, Veyron, Ascari

Lap 8 – Off at Copse.
Lap 9 – Off at Senna S.
lap 10 – Off at Copse.
Lap 11 – Off at The Screw.
Lap 12 – Off at Oulton.
Lap 13 – Off at Sebring.
Lap 14 – Off at Brundle.
Lap 15 – Off at Senna S.
Lap 16 – Off at The Screw.

There now followed 6 laps where I didn’t record my progress. I was getting frustrated and just wanted to keep trying rather than write down everything.

Veyron, Ascari, a bit of drift
Veyron, Ascari, a bit of drift, The Kink

Lap 23 – 2:14:526 Silver.

Again, there is a recording intermission of 6 laps of frustration.

Lap 30 – 2:13:583 GOLD.

I have all GOLD for all my Super Licence tests. Good job.

Veyron, Ascari, just because
Veyron, Ascari, just because, Sebring

I did get some reward cars, but didn’t note them down. The next time I turn the PS3 on I’ll have a look and try to remember to write them down here, because you care about that sort of thing.

All the pictures on this page came from my fastest lap. I do like how I got airborne at Rafael (the first corner). After watching the replay I can see plenty of apexes I missed and areas to improve my time if I so wished, but I probably don’t.

Pigeon Check Update

The “pigeon-check” is not longer necessary. See this communication. My place of work (see the EXIF data in the photo) has installed pigeon-spikes along the top of the building and so the level of poop has decreased to zero. Win!

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Doodle

Many thanks to Google for my personalised Google-Doodle today. I guess it’s not hard to figure out when to show that particular doodle but it made me smile.

Google Birthday

My age today is officially the answer to the meaning of life the universe and everything.

Super Licence S-4

Part of the continuing series in trying to develop a parameter as an example to use in teaching a topic I might not teach for a while. It’s an extremely feeble excuse, I know. This is a record of my attempts to pass the S-4 Super Licence in Gran Turismo 6.

This test is a timed lap of the Brands Hatch GP circuit in Kent, UK. The car to be used is the Lamborghini Aventador LP700-4. The only car adjustments that can be made are to the TCS and ABS systems.

GT6 needed to perform an update before I could play. It was a “light” one coming in at 100MB. I had to wait a short while before I could start the game.

The required times were:

  • 1:34:5 Gold
  • 1:36 Silver
  • 1:39 Bronze

Lap 1 – 1:43:258.
Car seems stable in the corners and not too much oversteer on exit when putting the power down. Now time to find where I can increase corner speed, especially exit speed on Surtees and Stirling’s.
Lap 2 – Hit cone on inside of Hawthorn’s trying to cut corner and get power on along the Derek Minter Straight.
Lap 3 – 1:38:825 Bronze.
Lap 4 – Off at Paddock Hill Corner.
Lap 5 – Off at the exit of Druids, too wide.
Lap 6 – 1:37:999
Lap 7 – Off at Hawthorn’s, lost rear of car on inside of corner.
Lap 8 – Off at the exit of Hawthorn’s, too wide, too fast.
Lap 9 – 1:36:428
Lap 10 – Off the exit of Sheene.
Lap 11 – Off at Paddock Hill exit.
Lap 12 – Off the exit of Hawthorn’s, oversteer on the entrance of the corner.
Lap 13 – Off at Hawthorn’s entrance.
Lap 14 – Off at Westfield.
Lap 15 – 1:35:599 Silver.
Lap 16 – Off at Hawthorn’s, oversteer.
Hawthorn’s appears to be my plague corner. It’s a high speed entrance, just after Pilgrim’s Drop and a good exit speed is needed to keep at low time along the Derek Minter Straight. It’s no coincidence that this is the corner I get wrong the most.
Lap 17 – Off at the exit of Graham Hill’s.
Lap 18 – Off on the entrance to Paddock Hill.
Lap 19 – Cut the corner and hit a cone at Hawthorn’s.
Lap 20 – 1:35:241 I was one second ahead until Sheene Curve where it went a little “scrappy”.
Lap 21 – Off along the Cooper Straight [can’t remember what happened there, but it would have been hilarious to watch!].
Lap 22 – Off at Graham Hill exit.
Lap 23 – Hawthorn’s again.
Lap 24 – Sheene Curve caused an exit from the tarmac.
Lap 25 – Hawthorn’s.
Lap 26 – Paddock Hill Corner.
Lap 27 – Sheene Curve exit.
Lap 28 – 1:35:006 a very scrappy lap.
Lap 29 – Druids, the *force* was used to push my car wide.
Lap 30 – 1:33:970 GOLD. Job done.

This was a very satisfying test to complete.

Here’s a shot of the car coming around Graham Hill Corner on my fastest lap.

A Lambo at Brands Hatch, Graham Hill Corner
A Lambo at Brands Hatch, Graham Hill Corner

Super Licence S-3

I’ve a feeling these communications will not prove interesting to most of my readership, but then again, I’m not sure what would interest my readers and this website isn’t for them anyway.

This is my progress through the Gran Turismo Super Licence S-3. The test is a lap of the Silverstone Stowe circuit in  KTM X-Bow R. This is a picture of the track with the double blue lines showing where the start and finish line is. The chicanes circled in blue aren’t part of the GT6 circuit.

StoweThe challenge times were:

  • 1:04:00  Bronze
  • 58:50 Silver
  • 57:03 Gold

The car is interesting. Here’s a shot as I headed down the long straight.

KTM X-BOW, Silverstone, Stowe Circuit
KTM X-BOW, Silverstone, Stowe Circuit

As this is a licence test adjustments can only be made to the traction control and anti lock brakes settings. My session went as follows:

Lap 1 – Off, first corner, oversteer.
Lap 2 – Collision corner 2, hit cones placed on inside to stop cutting the corners.
Lap 3 – Off last corner. No time set so far.
Lap 4 – Cut corner 1. Restart.
Lap 5 – Cut corner 2.
Lap 6 – 58:913 Bronze.
Lap 7 – 58:072 Silver.
Lap 8 – Off, last but 1 corner.
Lap 9 – Off at the end of the straight, too fast into the corner.
Insert here about 5 offs which I neglected to record.
Lap 15 – 58:137 Silver.
Lap 16 – 57:370. Close to Gold, 0.07 off.
Lap 17 – Off corner 4.
Lap 18 – Off corner 1.
Lap 19 – Off about half way around.
Lap 20 – 57:437.
Lap 21 – 57:121 Gold.

Job done. Here’s an arty shot:

KTM X-BOW, Silverstone, Stowe Circuit
KTM X-BOW, Silverstone, Stowe Circuit

 

Super Licence S-2

This is a communication about keeping track of my attempts at timed circuits in Gran Turismo 6. This particular test is part of the Super Licence. I had already completed the first part of this before I started this record keeping and so this is licence S-2. Generally the Super Licence requirements in all the GT games is to complete a single lap within a certain time limit and without leaving the track or bumping into a wall or Armco.

This licence test was at night time (hate it) at Willow Springs Race Circuit in California. I have done some other stuff at Willow Springs in the dark and so kinda knew what to look for in terms of braking points. The time requirements were:

  • Gold 1:27:8
  • Silver 1:29:5
  • Bronze 1:33

The car was an Alfa Romeo TZ3 Stradale. The only adjustments to the car that could be made were the traction control and ABS settings. As it was a licence test there were no options to adjust the suspension or gearing ratios.

Using the standard D-Pad controller for the PS3 I recorded a time of 1:33:857.

The next day I used the Logitech GT Driving Force Pro steering wheel system. Progress was as follows:

Lap 1 – 1:31:548 Bronze.
Lap 2 – Off at Castrol Corner. Adjust the TCS to 1.
Lap 3 – Off at Sweeper about 0.5 seconds ahead.
Lap 4 – 1:30:109 even with a near off where I had to slow to correct the car.
Lap 5 – Off Rabbit’s Ear (-0.2 s).
Lap 6 – Off Budweiser Balcony.
Lap 8 – Off turn 3 (-0.2 s)
Lap 9 – Off, cut the corner at Budweiser Balcony.
Lap 10 – 1:28:802 Silver
Lap 11 – 1:27:692 Gold

Now, you only need a bronze to pass the licence but there’s no fun in that. I feel as though I have to get Gold in everything.

Here’s the Willow Springs S-2 Licence Glory Shot (remember it was a night run):

An Alfa at Willow Springs
An Alfa at Willow Springs

Need For Speed

I rated this film on IMDB as a 4/10 using my new guidelines to rating films, discussed here.

This was a bad film. Let me try and explain my choice of words there. The script was bad, the acting was bad, the racing was comical, the plot was appalling and the geography was bad. The scenery was gorgeous and Michael Keaton was brilliantly over the top. Otherwise, this was in general a bad film. I wanted it to end after about an hour and it didn’t, it kept piling up the turds for another 70 minutes! Yes, this is a long, tedious bad film.

I shall now go into some more detail. Like most things in life we like to focus on the bad things and rant and moan and yet don’t commit the same dedication to the good things. My good reviews on this site are probably pretty short, while the bad ones just let the venom flow.

I fully understand that this movie is based on a game franchise and I have played a version of the game [Carbon I think] which was quite good fun. I’m more of a circuit racer than street racer as I don’t like the unpredictable. It’s why I never really got on with Mario Karts as I hated being in the lead and then some crappy mushroom hitting me and making me last. If it’s a driving game then I like driving and not being t-boned from out of nowhere.

The characters were pretty one-dimensional. There was a successful racer, Dino Brewster, who had left town and raced at Indy but was a bit of a cock. Well, those people exist. The reason he left town was because he was better driver at the time than the main character, Tobey Marshall. There’s a race. There’s a failing company and a last chance at redemption and getting the company going again. It seems that Tobey isn’t very organised or clever. He wins a race. There’s a death. Tobey goes to jail. Tobey gets released and immediately jumps bail to enter a race on the other side of the country. Oh god, it’s bad writing this, making me relive the film. I’ll cut to the chase and keep it simple.

They don’t where seat belts while racing. Now, you can’t get decent feedback from the car unless you are tucked in nice and tight.

Every corner requires oversteer. This isn’t the fastest way to get around a corner. Yes it looks flash but to win you need to go fast and sliding isn’t fast.

Geography. One moment we are in Detroit and then we are in the Grand Canyon [looking remarkably like Pixar’s Cars scenery] and then they are flown by helicopter to the Bonneville Salt Flats a mere 500 miles away. Really? Maybe I’m being too much of a realist?

The cars were quite nice but let down by deliberately jogging the camera while racing to make you think they were going faster than they really were. You know the simple tricks to make you worry about the speed limit:

  • Camera down by the road
  • Shaking
  • Endless gear changes
  • Filming close to increase the pan speed
  • Smoke from spinning wheels
  • Noise

Curiously most of the cars in the final race were European. There was a Saleen and possibly another US car but it seems that we Europeans have the best aesthetic appeal when it comes to cars.

The Ford-Shelby Mustang was interesting but then if you are renovating a car you don’t fit it with a HUD or Recaro seats, you make it like as it was intended to be. Oh, and the JUMP!! The Mustang was clearly heading for a major front axle bend when it landed. It’s like the old Dukes of Hazard when their car would launch and then obviously land at such an angle as to break the car in half and then in the very next shot Luke and Bo (?) would be seen driving normally.

If you have a USA Police Car chasing a Koenigsegg then, let’s face it, the Koenigsegg is going to win and at the same time it will speed away from the police, especially around corners. The film had police cars easily keeping up with the Koenigsegg. That’s not really how it works.

I’ll explain the biggest problem. I didn’t LIKE any of the characters. They were pretty much all arseholes.

It’s interesting now that when I see a film I form sentences that will eventually appear on this website. I try to remember my thoughts as the film develops and then commit them to this website. How did this film go? I remembered a lot and I’ve had to try and stop myself from filling pages about how bad this film was. If you want a car chase watch The Blues Brothers.