I spent the morning at the Showcase Cinema in the Bluewater shopping centre. I arrived very slightly late to the screen and I was amazed that the film had already started. My ticket time said 10:00 and I got there 10:07, normally there’s about 20 minutes of adverts so I was surprised that I missed the beginning of the film.
This is also the very FIRST time I have had a cinema screen to myself. There was no one else in the cinema. The minimum that had happened before was two people. I should have used the opportunity and moved from seat to seat throughout the film [which would have been better than the film] but I did not.
As is my habit I rated this film on IMDb and there’s some information about the scoring system on within this communication.
I rated Unlocked (2017) 4/10 #IMDb https://t.co/KqE4QdEzRe
— Ian Parish (@iparish) June 24, 2017
This film was quite terrible. It was meant to be a slick spy thriller but it was shit. It wasn’t slick. The script was appalling. The acting was fine and the actors were by and large very good at their job. But the story was shit. The script [again] was shit. It was all rather obvious.
AND THE SPY PROCEDURES AND TECHNOLOGY WERE BULLSHIT.
I will comment on a couple of things because if I was to break this film down into everything that was wrong with it I would be here typing for the rest of the day. It might be fun to do that once this comes out on DVD. I could sit here, watch 10 seconds and then let you know what was wrong with.
Gunshots everywhere in London and no police sirens.
Head of MI5 always wears a bullet proof vest?
Head of MI5 goes in the field?
Resting CIA spy knows head of MI5 personally?
Orlando Bloom mistakes Helmand as being in Iraq?
The Marburg virus was ONLY picked up by one kid?????
The delivery system of the virus was overly complicated.
Why have a countdown on the delivery system?
Burglers steal massive TVs from expensive apartments?
This entire film was entirely NOT plausible. Hence it scored 4/10.